10 Principles for Change

The last post addressed habits generally and philosophically. However, to truly change, we need more than simply good ideas. This post will address the practical.

But first, some preliminary words.

When you are seeking to replace old habits and develop new ones, or sow new seed, first choose wisely. The good news is that once your new habit is formed, it will expand your capacity and enable you to spend valuable mental and physical energy on other worthy pursuits. At the same time, forming a new habit is like making an investment; though good, it will demand of you time, energy, resources, and sacrifice. Know what the journey will demand and ensure that your goal is doable, realistic, and worth achieving.

In addition, know that implementing a habit may look different for you than it does for someone else. While we should imitate others as they imitate Christ (1 Cor. 11:1), beware of emulating even the best leader to the extent that you limit yourself by trying to fit into a mold that is already taken. Wield the weapons God has provided but do so in a way that aligns with your likes, your personality, your experience, your season of life, and your goals.

Next, define why you are seeking to develop this new habit so that you can remind yourself of this reason often. Vague goals are enemies of budding healthy habits. If applicable, identify why you might be engaging in the old habit and under what circumstances you are most vulnerable. As you continue, there will be days when it would be easier to go back to the old way. Knowing the “why” behind your objective will prove invaluable.

Anyone can formulate a goal, but good intentions, mental notes, and willpower are insufficient. They may help in combustion to launch us off the ground, but more is often needed. The introducing of a novel pleasure or reward (listening to music as you exercise or enjoying a healthier dessert) is just one example. Ideally, this reward would not interfere with the habit and would act like training wheels until your habit can ride without help. Just don’t forget to delight in what you have accomplished for its own sake. You care for your yard not for an external reward but to just enjoy it.

Below are some additional principles that may help.

Practical Principles

1. Concentrate your efforts toward one or two goals rather than attempting to tackle multiple habits or areas of change. You may have numerous habits in mind you could change. However, striving to correct or address all of them at once will wear you out. Beware of the draw and glamor of drastic change. Habit formation is about building, not flipping a switch or reinventing yourself overnight. Thoughtfully consider what area(s) you want to improve and begin with one small, concrete step at a time.

2. Harness each moment and choice as an opportunity for change. How do habits change? One decision, one day at a time, not by might nor by power, but by His Spirit (Zech. 4:6). Cultivate a contentment that, while eyeing the prize ahead, relishes each moment and morning as an occasion to serve the King of kings.

3. Replace your old habit with a new, healthy substitute. Old habits are always searching for a void. In the words of Erasmus, “A nail is driven out by another nail; habit is overcome by habit.” Driving out the dark is impossible without light. Reevaluate how the old habit is enticing you. Consider what kind of light, or new habit, you want, and redeem daily tasks as reminders to practice it.

4. Identify and eliminate distractions, hindrances, and destructive pleasures. Think of this time as figuring the price of something you really want but know will cost you. Just like it may be helpful to clear your workspace before beginning a new project, so it may be beneficial to devote some attention to minimizing and discarding that which will work against your efforts. Maybe this means saying no to a few activities or changing something in your environment so that certain cues or people do not trigger your old tendency. Whatever the case, radically cut out anything that will interfere with your goal. Alter the situation so that it requires a lot of you to give in and make no allowances (1 Cor. 9:27). Give the devil no fodder with which to feed the habit and self you are depriving (Eph. 4:27).

5. Surround yourself with a diverse community consisting of individuals who will tell you the truth, encourage you, and keep you accountable. Recruit others who will encourage and not tempt you, and foster, rather than mock, your resolve. Bad company cripples good convictions (1 Cor. 15:33), but he who walks with the wise becomes wise (Prov. 13:20). If possible, find someone to develop this habit with you and/or someone who has walked a similar path and can speak from their experience. Whatever it looks like, explore how you can weave uplifting fellowship into your journey on this new path.

6. Train yourself to guard your leisure and quiet moments with vigilance. As you begin to experience victory, you may consider going lenient on your newly developed habit. Do not! At first, this may sound contradictory. Why would we need to guard a habit? Is not the definition of a habit something we do automatically? While this is true, good habits are not neutral, and we have an enemy seeking to destroy the disciplines that bring us closer to God. In the words of John Wesley, “If, after having renounced all, we do not watch incessantly, and beseech God to accompany our vigilance with his, we shall be again entangled and overcome.” The days are evil, and it remains fatally easy to overestimate our self-control. Beware of anything that could lead you back to those old beaten trails or into complacency (Prov. 1:32).

7. Log successes and losses. In your success log, include what made each successful, how you feel because of the success, and what that success shows you about God. In your loss log, include what made each a loss, what in retrospect you would do differently, and what you are doing/will do as a preventive measure. A crumb of counsel here would be to aim high but expect little. Not only can this stave off feelings of discouragement and failure, but it can reinforce the sense that by God’s grace, you can do this, one success at a time.

8. Immerse yourself in truth via God’s Word and God-honoring music, reading, and anything else that will remind you of your purpose. In other words, ensure that your input will be a buttress for your goal. Success is never an accident; it requires intentionality. Return endlessly to your God for renewed strength, wisdom, and truth, and proactively pursue, include, and delight in Him. Our default is not wisdom but folly, not diligence but idleness, and not patience but pride. We desperately need His perspective like a hot, tired runner needs a refreshingly cool drink of water.

9. Kindle your love for God and righteousness that will propel your change. Look for ways to cultivate your love for Christ, in whose power and strength you can experience true change. Why do we sin? Not because we need it. Everything sin promises (acceptance and belonging, pleasure, power, companionship, freedom, identity) has already been purchased for us perfectly in Christ. We sin because we love it. We will never be able to refuse or resist the subtle schemes of Satan until we replace and redirect the affections of our hearts. There is a reason we are told as new creatures to not only cultivate Christlike behavior; we are also to not love the world (1 Jn. 2:15). Consciously expose yourself to that which will enamor you with the glory and grace of our Beloved and feed your desire for Him (Rom. 6:18).

10. Explore how you will deal with potentially compromising situations. The world will not conform to us and our holy pursuits. Weakness, pride, insecurity, busyness, idleness, and fear remain its tools to disciple us in its image. As you anticipate potentially compromising situations, whether with friends or family, think about what you will do or write a script explaining your decision to those you may encounter. They may not understand, but that is okay. Do the thinking and planning beforehand so that when the time comes, you’re ready. By preparing for anything that could become a battle, you set yourself up, by the grace of God, to win.