Why What We Wear Matters

It’s easy to judge others and ourselves by different standards, and even easier to judge our family. Why does he do that? Why don’t they do this? Does she know what she’s saying? I wouldn’t dream of doing that!

The conversation about “church clothes” and dressing up for church in some ways tends to focus on extremes. On one end are those who would take the “just as you are” position. God cares about your heart. Just come as you are. What matters is that you’re in church!

On the other end are those who tend to lean more towards legalism. What matters is what you wear. The “why” gets lost in translation.

In some ways, the Bible addresses beauty and clothing more in virtuous than material terms. For instance, believers ought to “clothe” themselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness, and patience (Col. 3:12) and with “righteous deeds” (Rev. 19:8).

Women specifically are told that submission, purity, reverence, and a gentle and quiet spirit are the adornments God values (1 Pet. 3:1-6). In Proverbs 31:25, the righteous woman is clothed “in strength and dignity.” According to 1 Timothy 2:9, women are to dress not only “modestly” but “with decency and propriety, adorning themselves... with good deeds, appropriate for women who worship God.”

These attitudes are reflected in the modest way we dress. Our choice to follow Christ not only affects our appearance but our behavior and wardrobe as well. We are to clothe ourselves with good deeds, gentleness, humility, and reverence. Part of that is dressing appropriately to not be a distraction during worship, when God should be the focus.

What we wear is important, but it shouldn’t take priority over the condition of our hearts and spiritual growth. Dress codes for church and school have some value, but they don’t translate to “strength and dignity.” The Person of Christ and seeking Him as well as discipleship and spiritual disciplines are good things to focus on. I would argue that dress codes don’t meet that same bar. People tend to emphasize the outer appearance, but “the Lord looks on the heart” (1 Sam. 16:7). When standards are imposed but not explained, and the outside becomes the priority, hypocrisy and legalism can easily creep in.

One time my family attended a local church for several months that had an unwritten dress code. We were unaware of this until we brought a neighbor, and the pastor made a comment about what he was wearing. It not only embarrassed us but made our neighbor feel uncomfortable. He was dressed casually, but he wasn’t in any way wearing something offensive. We eventually stopped attending.

Again, I’m not saying that dress codes have no value, but rather that we shouldn’t allow them to consume us or prioritize them over discipleship and a personal relationship with God. What we wear matters, but it’s also a personal choice and should be reflective of a deeper attitude and posture of the heart.

I don’t believe it’s a biblical issue to dress differently for church but a matter of personal conviction. The way I dress at church reflects how I value gathering together and, more importantly, worshiping God with fellow believers. Do I worship God at home in pajamas? Absolutely, but if I arrived at church that way it might give the impression that I don’t value our time together enough to look presentable. Does God see my heart? Yes, but my heart is rarely the first thing other people see. We shouldn’t judge others based on their clothing, but others generally will form an opinion of us based on ours.

To be clear, not caring or attending to the way we dress doesn’t make us less Christian. Our clothes don’t determine our salvation; Jesus does. At the same time, when we profess Christ, He becomes supreme over all things. That includes our wardrobe.

Outside church, we represent Christ to the world (2 Cor. 5:20) and need to represent Him well. Our choice of clothing—whether at church, at home, at work, or at school—is part of that. Where we are doesn’t change the fact that we’re ambassadors. Location doesn’t change our identity or calling. My body is not my own but a tool with which to glorify God (Rom. 12:1-2; 1 Cor. 6:19-20). I want to do my best to be an ambassador for Him, and I wouldn’t want anyone representing me in pajamas.

As a final note, a lot of this is cultural. Christians in other parts of the world may have only one set of clothes. What we have is a privilege.

Wherever we are, however, the principle remains, that our heart, our attitude of modesty and humility, and our worship are what matters. Even in our dress we can choose to put God and others first.

God should be our center and foundation. His Word should have the final say in everything we do. That doesn’t mean we’ll all look alike but rather that we’ll all come from the same place of not wanting to steal the attention and glory that rightly belongs to God.

We can easily get lost in standards, codes, and good unwritten rules, which there’s certainly a place for. Sometimes guidance is needed as well as (dare I say) gentle confrontation. At the same time, for both ends of the spectrum, let’s not forget the heart.